My Miracle From God
Well, here I go. My first blog post in like a century! Ok, really it was only 3 months or so, but it feels like forever! This post is not gonna be about fashion, and I am not gonna apologize for it. This is MY blog, so I will write what I want to write about.
Well, the last three months are a blur, and I don’t mind telling you that I am glad that they are over. Not because they were horrible, but they weren’t my favorite! I am writing this post as a new mommy… well technically today I am two weeks old…I mean my baby is two weeks old and well, I am his mommy; so I am basically a two week old mommy..
Birthing stories seem so typical once the baby has been popped out, and it seems like that is all the mother of the child wants to talk about. Well, I do anyway. By the way, for those of you who have not had children yet, they say that you forget all the pain, agony, etc. after the baby is born. That’s just not true; the next time you hear a mother say that, you will know she is lying, cause well, I am telling you right now that I remember all of it.
The one thing that is so completely true is that child is worth every day of back pain, cramping, leg spasms, unnecessary weight gain, stretch marks, clothes that don’t fit, going up three sizes in panties, watching your boobs become watermelons, mood swings, headaches, constipation, starvation even though you’ve eaten 5 meals that day, uncomfortable doctor appointments, watching the latest trends come out and crying hysterically cause nothing fits that round belly, and the list goes on and on. When they laid my Little Bear in my arms, I was so full of joy! Not because it was all over, but because he was more precious than I could have ever hoped or imagined him to be.
So, this is me telling my birth story; I mean seriously, I want everyone to hear it. I am a champion, and I want everyone to know about it (you would think that no one has ever had a child before with the way I act.) Seriously, all you mommies out there: High five! Group hug! Fist pump! I have had some serious anxiety issues with this pregnancy, but the classes taught me so much… which, let me just insert here that you need to go if and when you are expecting. You are so much the wiser for it, and it is not a waste of your time. We ended the last of our classes, and I had a lot of confidence.
My husband knew that I wanted to go all natural if I could, and I desperately wanted a doula present during labor. Well, October came and went, and still no bundle of joy in my arms. He was still in my belly, and he was making me very uncomfortable. As each day passed, my confidence was thrown out the window, and with that came extreme anxiety! I couldn’t sleep, concentrate, everything made me jump, and I was becoming more terrified the longer I waited.
Finally at 41 weeks, I had my doctor’s appointment and told him I needed to be induced; the anxiety was getting the best of me and I couldn’t hold out any longer. He scheduled the induction for Tuesday, November 6th at 7:00 p.m. My family had just arrived in town, so on Tuesday, we had an early Thanksgiving dinner, and then we were off to the hospital.
When I got there, they administered the medicine that ripens your cervix. In other words, you stay in the hospital all night waiting like you’ve been doing the last ten months of your life. The nurse informed me that my doctor would be in to administer the Pitocin at 7 am. (For those of you who don’t know, Pitocin is supposed to bring on the contractions and the higher the dose is, the stronger the contractions will be.)
I was awakened sometime around 5am to the woman next door screaming. Not crying, not yelling, but screaming. She was in labor, and… I was officially scared. Around 7, the doctor came in and very quickly informed me that he was going to break my water. I had about 30 seconds to process what he was actually saying before it was happening and I was hurting. He finished, instructed the nurse, and was out of the room.
About 15 minutes after he broke my water, the contractions started coming, and I mean fast. I had no time to think or prepare; I was not even in the mindset that labor was happening, but it was, and it was not slowing down. They say it’s typical to have 4-6 contractions in one hour at the beginning of labor, and then it increases to contractions lasting 30-45 seconds 4 and 5 minutes apart and so on. So, you have all the stages of labor to go through: early labor, active labor, and transition. Well, let me just say that there were no stages. It was full hard labor as soon as he broke my water.
When the nurse walked back in the room, I was contracting a full minute with a minute and a half between, which increased to 60-80 seconds with a 45 sec break. My cervix was contracting longer than I was getting a break, and I thought I was dying. This baby wasn’t dropping down; it was like someone was pulling him out of me! I was scared. I didn’t have that peace that some moms say washes over them. I did not ever have a chance to escape somewhere in my mind with my thoughts. All I could think about was how much pain I was in. I had no idea that my doula had walked into the room until I heard her peaceful rhythm of breathing, and for a second, I felt like I was gonna be ok.
Then another contraction came… My mom got to the hospital and was just a little shocked to find out I had progressed so fast. The nurse administered the Pitocin, kept it on the lowest setting, and then started pumping fluids into my system. For almost three hours I labored hard. I couldn’t sit. I couldn’t stand. I leaned on my Andrew’s shoulders for three hours.
Then, I am being forced to sit down so they can administer the epidural. Forced you ask? Yes, forced! I was scared out of my mind at that point, and I could not sit down. So the nurse, dula, and my husband made me. That was the longest of my pain; I had to sit for 30 minutes while the annoying guy finished administering the medication. …Then it kicked in. It was like Jesus said; “Peace be still,” and the winds and waves obeyed His voice. I cannot tell you how relieved I was.
Finally, I was able to concentrate. Finally, I could open my eyes. Finally, I could introduce myself to my doula. Finally, I could pray for the rest of my delivery. The calm lasted about an hour, and I was in extreme pain again; you see, the epidural somehow had not covered my right side, so I could still feel the contractions in my lower back. This time, I was calmer. I felt like I was in control, and I had full concentration. Labor progressed quickly, and by 1:15 p.m., I was at a 10!
All while they were preparing me to push, I kept thinking, “This isn’t real. They are lying. It’s not almost over. Don’t believe them.” I was filled with doubt, and I started panicking again. It was during this time that my husband was strength that I did not have in me. I have never felt so scared and yet so protected at the same time. He was my rock, and I couldn’t have done it without him.
Baron Lee Pfeiffer was born November 7, 2012 at 1:46 p.m. weighing 8lbs and 19 inches long. I can say that it was worth it. He was worth all of that pain, and I would do it again for him. My labor was not anything like I expected. I went to classes. I had a birth plan. None of it was what I expected, but gosh was it worth it. My doula was amazing; she was the peace in the room. She helped calm me so much, and she knew exactly what to do and say. My Momma was my comfort; she held my hand, wiped my tears, cried with me, and encouraged me to keep going. Andrew was my strength. He was amazing and exactly what I needed him to be.
My baby is two weeks old, and he changes every single day. He has changed me: changed my heart, my emotions, and the way I perceive things. He has brought a whole new meaning to life, and I love that he is here. This child is such a treasure. Baron is a gift from God, and I will thank Him every day for the honor of being his Mommy. That’s right peeps; I am a Mommy, and I have never been more proud!